Kiss Your Miracle

Christmas 2009 has come and gone, and I have to say that part of me is relieved. I hadn’t been looking forward to this first year without my dad, especially since the rest of my family was 1200 miles away in Michigan. But overall, the holiday wasn’t as difficult as I’d expected. We spent Christmas Day with Adam’s sweet family, who lavished Sky with gift after gift. I couldn’t help but feel grateful for our Florida family as we sat around eating quiche and bagels that morning, taking turns pulling Sky around our living room in her new red wagon, which she still can’t get enough of (good job Grammy and Grandpa!).

My highlight though, was Christmas Eve. Our original plan had been the candlelight service at our church – until we found out there would be no childcare. At seventeen months, Sky isn’t capable of even five minutes of quiet stillness and it didn’t seem fair to ask that of her. Adam and I debated going anyway, but finally decided that it might be more meaningful to stay home together instead of trading off with Sky in the lobby. When Sky suddenly threw up all over the kitchen floor at 5:45pm, Adam and I were more than relieved to be at home instead of the 5 o’clock service. We ended up putting her to bed a little after 7, thinking we’d hear from her soon afterward, but apparently her “sickness” was just a little random puking because she slept straight through till morning.

Once Sky was in bed, Adam and I shared a little wine, ate grilled steak and baked potatoes for dinner, and read Matthew 5 together. It’s not a traditional Christmas passage, but for us that night, it was perfect. We sat at the table for two hours discussing the words of Jesus. Then before bed, we ate some of Jesus’ birthday cake with a little ice cream on the side.

I love my family with all my heart and I always look forward to sharing Christmas with them, but this year the grief of missing my dad made it easier to think about God and his promise of eternal life. My mom is constantly pointing out ways God has blessed us during this difficult year, and I think that Christmas Eve was one of them for me. A couple hours with Adam where we focused on God together – no dressing up, no socializing, no presents, no agenda. It was exactly what I needed for Christmas this year.